One of my favourite Peach transformations! Part 2

I’ll be posting a lot of Princess Peach fanart slowly in the time ahead and spaced out…just a heads up! ;D

I’ve been taking ages since I ended up making too many sketches and it’ll take a long while for me to finish each slowly :’) Was trying to finish this up super late so lacking in sleep ahhh

I was tempted to not bother rendering but eh I want to finish it properly and take it slow as much as I feel other pressures to move onto something else :<

I won’t be playing this game for quite a while though…I am still trying to finish Pikmin 4 soon! :’)

Also this is the first piece I’m not cross posting to twitter – trying to post and use it less! I don’t want to depend on twitter and it still remains to be one of the main places I reach more people (since the metrics between twitter and instagram and bluesky end up similar). :’)

Leonie rambles about…

Crossy Road Castle is being brought into Apple Vision Pro/Apple Arcade – congrats to the HW team who worked hard on this! No I’m not involved directly on that, just mentioning it! Technically I helped out with decorations for the main game’s tower updates too.

Unbiased reaction to “Can You Tell if Someone has Autism?” (Thought Spot)

• really great food for thought and discussing shades of grey
• oh I definitely tense up, get emotionally affected & freeze up when people are having a hard emotional time
  • I fail to know how to comfort someone in words, I’m better at listening :’)
• oh I also jump randomly with my thoughts as anecdotes and intrusive thoughts come up too!
• I do get minimally verbal, get flustered and/or freeze up when overstimulated
• yeah lack of friends and how it’s isolating too
  • I can’t balance and handle too much friendship maintenance and emotional and physical overstimulation (especially if people are high energy)
  • I know friendship requires mileage, mutual effort, work and interest and my range of interests and energy is super low :’)
  • plus general anxiety on top of my other things, interests, work, environment and life
  • I also thought I was a terrible friend because I can’t juggle and don’t have the energy/interest to do more draining social things when I’ve been drained with life as it is
  • I can’t split my time and attention across many people at once and I’m a one at a time person too :’)
  • as much I used to force myself to (and face the discomfort and stress) I guess I really don’t thrive in communities because I’m anti social in person (with groups) and I prefer to minimally emote react to things as a deadpan, reserved person :S
  • and I really need to watch out for my energy levels and overstimulation so I don’t burnout and shut down as much
    • at the same time I rarely go out so I just force myself to endure longer to make the most of things :’)
  • the resistance is high because with events/group social things I’m there because of desperation/desensitising myself and not usually because I have a buddy to anchor to and depend on :’)
    • in my experience casual acquaintances/friends don’t want to stick by you when they got other friends/acquaintances they want to hang around with more
    • and I also not keen on being roped into what the group wants to do for too long – when I have other plans
    • so ultimately I need to have a good time on my own and not depend on others – which often ends up with me enjoying parts of it when I do get to 1 to 1 catch up and the rest is where I’m faking it, stressing, floating around and trying to emotionally survive the rest of it where I’m just not connecting with anyone (which is probably the common experience)
    • mingling and trying to find the next person to talk to in itself is not fun for me but how else to meet people :<
    • I definitely do appreciate when people introduce new people with each other so it’s less awkward :’)
• I also do feel resentment that coping mechanisms and masking can only go so far and it’s not something I can keep doing all the time to seem “normal”, nor do I want to since I fail to act normal anyway
• I do feel waves of resentment and envy that I don’t have the huge charisma/endurance/popularity/family/friends/career/support/energy/audience like many other people/artists seem to have because I’m not social/good/lucky/committed enough :’)
• I know there’s a part 2 and I’ve watched it but I don’t have too much to add
  • interesting that weed helps with symptoms but not personally for me
  • I’m also bothered and wary that autistic peeps and including myself in some ways – get taken advantage of
  • it has happened a bunch of times where I gave the benefit of the doubt (times where I hate subtlety and vagueness) and faced the consequences of being too trusting
• I feel like a grumpy, sensitive jerk at times when there’s stress, pressure, anxiety and overwhelm + I’m feeling unequal/lacking and I have to compensate and/or mask my actual petty, mixed, hurt, overstimulated, anxious feelings :'(
• usually I’m pretty much zoning out and people leave me alone
• I am indeed in my solitary hermit hole and to break out of it I need to desensitise myself
  • a lot of “just do it”, “practice how to do it” and then “get good/used to/familar doing it”
  • but it becomes a “should” and not because I’m interested – again I’m not sure what social activity I’d actually be interested in and would be willing to commit to :S
  • I’m more suited to one off planned things which is rare
  • I’m also hesitant to eat with people unmasked, I do not want to deal with nighttime transport (but everyone else are busy during daytime hours and events are at night whyyyy) and I need to make the most of it to make it worth the effort for me :’)
  • I’ll think more about it more because it always involves compromise either way
• maybe I do need to stream so I can get used to talking to people (still anxiety!!) and within my own environment…

booktok & the hotgirlification of reading (Mina Le)

• history of books!! And reading books as a status symbol
• books to adhere to personal branding/what the community deems popular
• how the algorithm doesn’t reward creativity and niche things across the board
• I have so many art and other books I haven’t read but I want to read or end up not wanting to read :’)

I watched Nimona (2023) SPOILER THOUGHTS

• I have read the graphic novel and based from my bad memory it doesn’t match with it :’)
• it’s a good movie to watch once where Nimona can represent a lot of things and themes; a wonderful message
• I’m just overstimulated by the bombastic approach
• they spell/verbalise everything and character thoughts out to you…in a somewhat annoying way
• they have tech now in this world
  • what’s real/faked online and mob mentality etc feels too relevant to current issues
• the characterisation of Ballister is different and not what I expected…and with the puss in boots eyes…
• the dance number reminded me of Sonic 2 the movie
• world building wise it felt shallow the more I think deeper so I won’t bother haha
• it’s different and I’m not sure if I like it enough to watch it again
• I feel like this movie isn’t for me and Nimona as a character is done well even though it’s tropey
• art style at times good, at times not as sure
• characters kind of got annoying, they didn’t go deep into the themes and story gets predictable as I guessed a lot of things right :’)
• …I guess I don’t like this movie – it’s not for me the more I think about it :’)

Not watching Kung Fu Panda 4…

• also I do not want to watch Kung Fu Panda 4 anymore after seeing all the reviews, comments and fears confirmed – it’s ruined, co-director left during the production and the main character designer 🙁
• especially since I don’t like how all the character development and lore are disregarded and disrespected from previous movies
• it’s a movie that doesn’t respect and keep to the wonderful standards of the KFP movies (1 and 2 mostly) that came before so I refuse to watch anymore :’)
• I am mourning though…the first two movies are brilliant :’)
• this is great though Tenacious D – Baby One More Time (Music Video) Kung Fu Panda 4 Ending Song

The “Authentic” Content Trap (Jermelli) – great reality check

The whole thing about retention/fast paced editing versus talking head/just talking video – online things aren’t fully authentic when everything is somewhat planned either way. And people wanting to be lazy versus putting too much production into videos – it really depends on luck, how it’s executed, the personality/charm and value you bring to viewers.

The authenticity thing depends on the person on what public facing persona we get/show.

Adapting, improve and not be lazy about making videos – well this makes me not want to do youtube because it’s so much work if you’re aiming for high production quality, b rolls, scripts that take 3 months, etc. I don’t have enough interest and energy for that right now :’)

And I don’t think streaming is for me (or I’m just chicken and I need to get out of my comfort zone) as much as the “not having to edit” seems enticing and I feel so indecisive about it all every time it comes up and how other artists who do it make it seem possible. It is still nevertheless a grind/hustle in itself. I do hope to test it out again when I need to body double me studying and learning things…

I enjoy rambling but I value my time and don’t want to waste other people’s time and attention too much either (social platforms are designed to do this so I am still part of the problem). Conflicted hermit here…

I can’t do videos for every piece I do and I know making videos take time. Do I do occasional, rare, selective podcasts based on my blog posts again? It is one way for this blog to reach people but I get all anxious and doubtful whether I have anything of value worth to say and then I stress and chicken my way out :’)

What is sustainable?? I don’t want to do scripted commentary videos – it’s terribly time consuming! This blog is enough and plenty as it is! Plus now I’m feeling guilty that I’m not making regular videos anymore :”)

I think I may lean back to timelapse shorts/reels now since most people don’t watch my regular timelapses/videos beyond 30 seconds when I look at my analytics. So I might slowly get around to making shorts again for old and new pieces so I can catch things up :’) Shorts at least keep it short and sweet? As much as I don’t feel great about fast food content…

And perhaps I’d do compilation videos with or without subtitles if it feels apt…

It also requires much more effort to put together and I’m not trying to do substantial commentary to make videos more valuable for viewers. Well I’ll give it a try anyway if it feels right to compile together. Ugh I feel like youtube is like a lottery and I have to keep trying different things :0

I think I’ll switch between videos and shorts depending on whether I can fit the art in a vertical format or if people can even recognise what I’m drawing :S Or stick to videos but without or simplify the subtitles…gah apologies for being indecisive for ages! I really don’t know what I’m doing and am second guessing myself.

Okay…I think I should give compilation videos a go so that it respects my time and viewers’ time hopefully…! I will post the video as its own blog post as well since it is its own mini blog ramble if I’m going to subtitle it.

I will try to space my posts and post things sparingly if it’s not too time sensitive? At least to buy myself time for learning, work, art, recreation, sleep and whatnot. I’ll keep winging it so that at least there’s 1-2 posts a month if it’s really bad and stressful :’)

Also I finally cut my own scruffy hair! I was procrastinating and now hair gets in my face :’)

I don’t know if this post makes sense as I’m running low on sleep today :’)

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