There’s a Mallard mascot running about in this Theme Park! Time for Mallard to investigate this impostor!! 🤨 [timelapse]

Rival duck from Crossy Road Castle is here and sus about this new duck too ;P

They have a common enemy (for now) ;D

I did this during late October :0

Also Sara got inspired to do her own take with the funny idea of Mallard squinting at Mallard mascot (and thoughtfully asked if she could do it for tiktok) when I showed her this illustration. I’ll link her tiktok video here since it was made and posted before I posted my fanart haha

Leonie rambles: my first in-office days (hybrid in-office & WFH/remote) & easing myself into it as a hermit

This cubical Mallard lives on my new HW office desk!! :0

So for context, last week I started working 4 days a week instead of 3, half in office and half not.

Seeing how collaboration, routine, communication, time management, energy, life errands, exercise, sleep, workflow, meetings and maybe connecting with coworkers goes for a few months!

Pushing my comfort zone! This is an intervention for me to not be an outsourced artist anymore.

I’m changing up my night owl, remote routine/lifestyle. Well…least when I have to! Because I still do night owl things on other days (it’s when I’m more in focus) so my sleep schedule is all over the place.

Don’t have it figured out yet since a lot of life changes happening and I’m much more tired than before :0

It’s still part time as I can’t do full time. I know my personal limits and I would become an exhausted, grumpy, head foggy zombie husk by day 5 and I won’t fully recover over the weekend based on past experiences.

Will do my best – I’m so used to not being in the loop with office/in person things so I’m not sure how to get to know people/coworkers 1 to 1 (individually) in person better because we’re all in work mode anyway. As an awkward alien, I’ll let things happen naturally, in baby steps and not expect anything like friendship – just as long good team work happens! :0

My first in-office days thoughts & notes

• I didn’t really feel super productive (well I did do a meeting) as expected with my orientation week/month/period
  • yes I’m stretching the period because I don’t know
  • especially when I have yet to have my workstation set up at my office desk as of writing
  • I have a super slow ol’ work laptop that can’t handle unity
    • it kept importing for 5-6 hours and made other programs sluggish too :’)
    • I just gave up in the end as the laptop couldn’t handle unity anymore
• walking with lots of bags at times
  • so I already tired myself out in the morning since 5:50am
  • since I need to buy my own personal office supplies and other errands when I’m outside
• sorting, figuring out office things,
• being an observer/listener of how peeps/things/routines work
  • (I’m a meek alien with people eep)
  • trying to say hello when acknowledged
    • and/or when I notice people coming/going
  • hard to speak up about non work things when it’s quiet work mode
  • also if people are already talking, it’s already stimulating and I don’t want to add to it if I don’t already have something to say
• didn’t really talk much as I am not a social group person
  • as you may know, I’m more of a 1 to 1 person
    • and even then it depends if we feel comfortable/fun with each other
    • and on the same page talking about things
  • people are of course working when not in lunch groups,
  • I guess sometimes I’m an eavesdropper for the casual conversations haha
  • no privacy in open offices so one needs to be mindful
  • the thing is when I do speak I tend to focus on one person and zone out everyone else so I don’t get overstimulated with too many souls to be sensitive/hyper aware about
    • can’t guarantee that people won’t jump in and take over though and then I go back to listening and quietly processing things
    • or spacing out when tired
  • in the past I get the “why you’re so quiet” or feel invisible as I’m not talking/speaking
    • can I be a listener please :’)
    • or prompt me to speak so I don’t second guess / hesitate / freeze up on whether/when I can jump in :’)
    • I lack the confidence especially when I don’t get to know people individually
      • (which is often the case)
  • I accept I’m not socially charismatic, energetic, outgoing, entertaining
  • gah me and my sensory sensitivities and low energy and social quota
• I am a “eat lunch at desk” person due to my anxieties around taking down my face mask around people (so I avoid social eating)
  • I eat lunch earlier too as it doubles as my breakfast (maybe I should call it brunch more)
    • (hey I’m very hungry, I don’t want to wait longer)
  • I eat dinner earlier than most people too
  • all I can do is eat on my own and listen to conversations if audible/any
    • maybe if I’m lucky the social interaction happens at a different time…
    • but it needs scheduling or it probably won’t happen
• was covering up bright office lights; felt like a smaller set of glaring hospital lights on my desk :S
  • (needed to be thicker with more paper to dilute the light more but I ran out),
  • the paper kept falling down noooo
• bungling/forgetting things because I’m not used to this routine yet :’)
  • I didn’t eat much lunch thanks to my clumsy hands one day
  • I forgot my water bottle so I was dehydrated :<
  • forgot the way to access work related things too on the first day
  • forgot things I usually do because I wasn’t being in autopilot from my previous routine
• I’m still overwhelmed by the choices of food places…
  • what is actually worth getting since things are super pricey and/or underwhelming for the price
  • so far city food has bit hit and miss…
  • or okay but too expensive
  • need to find cheap lunch takeaway options…
• I did keep myself busy with the Pikmin walking tracker and keeping them going ;D
• I don’t miss lugging around a heavy backpack and other bags around
  • my shoulders get sore for days afterwards!!
  • I used to carry lots of things for school, work and outside things since I’m overprepared
  • I did offload things at my office desk/area so I don’t have to carry as much
  • glad I got some drawers to store things away yay
  • still I have back up bags and things in case I need it
• A lot of “what else I need to set up???”
  • “Oh I forgot that!! Ah I need to buy that! Whoops I need to ask for this!”
  • it’s ongoing during this period
  • did office related shopping since I don’t have my own things like notepads, pens, tissues, etc
• So far it is forcing me to sleep earlier and wake earlier (sticking with 6am) for those in office days again
  • avoiding morning peak hour that way too
  • hard to make sure I get enough sleep especially when my night owl tendencies kick in
• Getting overwhelmed by the city
  • (as with anything that involves lots of noise, people/crowds, attention grabbing shenanigans)
  • so I usually just zone it out and hyperfocus on where I’m going/doing next instead
  • or get lost in my own thoughts
  • on the outside it looks like I’m quiet and staring at things though :’)
  • taking time to adjust/transition between work mode and other things like interruptions, breaks, walks and when I’m figuring out what I’m doing
• tested out some earplugs to see if it’ll help with sensory overload from everything and with the open office :0
  • earplugs work quite well in dulling the sound but I can still hear noise/some words depending on the mode
  • though so far I’m not listening/watching anything as I work
  • as I don’t have fancy airpods
  • just left to my thoughts and keeping myself relaxed as best I can
  • figuring out if I need to bring out headphones so I can listen to things
  • trying to manage my high sensitivities / stress / overwhelm to things
• how social mode makes me not feel like myself and go into survival mode with the overstimulation :’)
  • gosh I just laugh through my awkwardness when I do speak
  • and stumbling on my spoken words
• Coworkers have been super understanding, supportive and patient with me
  • while I’m just quietly taking things in and trying to set up things haha
  • and being an awkward alien :’)
  • and trying to tone down my workaholic nature
• I freeze up a lot while pondering how to best tackle things (like an alien)
  • before I do something I’m not used to (how do I approach doing this??)
  • or when distracted
  • or when I’m juggling many things
• trying to get used to things,
  • figuring out my routine for this in the remaining time of this year/early next year
• Low energy management is going to be always a thing :’)
  • need to get started on tea to stay awake next time??
    • I didn’t during the first two in office days :S
    • yet I had tea on another day and still sleepy….gah my stamina/tolerance is low
  • got sleepy mid afternoon & managed to stay awake
    • sitting there and then eyes go droopy at times
    • when you are seated and more passive then your body calms down, the tiredness catches up and you get sleepy
  • how to stay awake?? :’)
    • I saw that I should drink more water
    • take more restroom breaks
    • stand, walk around to recharge
    • take power naps (uh I don’t have the space)
    • listen to energising music (do I need headphones??)
    • make sure I get enough sleep
    • drink tea in the mornings and during meetings
    • healthy snacking?
    • massage pressure points?
    • cold water face splash?
  • I know I’m going to be more tired and sleepy
  • aye I’m always managing my horribly low stamina/energy
    • especially when transitioning between activities/modes/sensory environments
  • And I need to slowly figure out how to juggle with things outside of work better
• got lost/trapped at a shopping centre and went up and down many floors and facing lots of dead ends too
  • I was told it was a dungeon and I couldn’t get out for 15 – 20 minutes…
• travel/commute times vary a bunch and is draining – at least under 1.5 hours one way
  • it’s exhausting when you have to walk, train and bus
  • and the bus is the least frequent and I can’t depend on getting a lift/taxis :/
  • one of the days I was red and hot in my face because I was overheating under the summer sun when I was trying to walk/get home :’)
  • one of the reasons I don’t do night things – transportation/commute
    • and also the fact that I need the night for my calm, quiet, slow, boring, recovery alone time :’D
• after work I was just a drained, tired blob that can’t really do anything mentally involved
  • already on edge, head feeling heavy and can’t function properly
  • a lot of chores to do right after too so that added to my exhaustion
  • again I need some quiet alone time at night to properly recover somewhat..
    • or rather what’s left of my evening
  • after work/outside shenanigans/commute I’m a blob who needs to decompress badly
    • and also during days after
  • I need at least 1.5 to 2 hermit days for proper recovery after one day of outside shenanigans
  • gah I’m already horribly tired, drained and wanting to retreat after one relatively chill in-office day!!
• I’ve done open office shenanigans before and back then I was in office full time
  • so it was even worse than now
  • I was definitely a burnt out zombie that kept pushing through!
  • I *really* don’t want to do in-office full time again

Hope things work out and that I can manage my tiredness better! I’d probably be winging it.

With working from home side of things

So working from home is evidently not new to me but this is what’s different:

• I was setting things up so I don’t have to lug around a heavy laptop between work places
• unity is a pain in the butt
  • I lost my work because it got stuck importing due to a tiny scale change I did??
  • slow newbie with unity again
• I had to force myself to stop getting carried away and working into the late night…trying to get used to it :’)
  • Not perfect forcing myself to stop working once I was finally on a roll / in the flow
  • as after dinner I was still working/finishing up
  • (I need to render and upload my work!!)
  • or unity being an obstacle and keeping me working longer!
  • also I was make up time since I exercise during my lunch break
  • had to give immediate emotional support to someone in need too. So it is not overtime
  • hot weather afternoons got me unproductive & slow for another day also
  • will be lurking through when I’m exercising so I’m still available if needed
    • I’ll keep myself available as needed for those key times
• I’d work a bit more at night to make up time and striving *not* to do overtime where I can help it
  • overtime is only when it’s agreed upon
  • it won’t be perfect but it keeps me on my toes as I juggle!
  • it’ll always be a juggle as I know there’s times where I’m just not productive
    • (mornings and mid afternoons are hard)
    • I think I’m better during early afternoon and evenings
  • other times where I’m in the flow
• finding that I’m in recovery mode from the in-office days when I’m working remote
  • wait I’m always in recovery hermit mode when I’m not doing outside things haha
• so in turn I have to make the most of my days I *do* go outside
  • get some shopping done or actually try some food

Again wondering/figuring out how to better fit in learning & personal art time + life admin/chores and recreation. Though I’m usually too tired at night to feel productive (especially when having uncomfortable, sluggish, summer hot weather now). I don’t know yet. I crammed some house cleaning and chores during my off day last week. All I can do is just fit it in, attempt at things when I feel up to it :S

I still consider myself a hermit/homebody since I don’t often do much outside shenanigans!! Especially given how I want to keep things quiet and chill for myself and not performative. So I won’t change my profile/bio haha

Hermit autistic Leonie needs to make things work and adapt somehow…I don’t know if I got it right yet.

It’s too early to say whether I’ve adapted (I just started during this orientation period) but I’ll reflect again here after a month or so! I probably need several months given that I’ve been a remote artist for several years!

I need time to adapt and hone my routine. And figure out how to interact with people :0

Let’s see how I go, getting used to all this :0

Stressful and changes in other ways too

Gosh feeling anxious for someone you care about and their mental state feels awful and stressful and you don’t know what you can do but to be there for them (the aforementioned emotional support I had to be around for). More intense family troubles happening at the same time my first week of hybrid work too (without going into details).

It’s ongoing but I’ll do my best to support :<

Consequently there’s more financial pressure on me now that I’m the “breadwinner” and I will have to be more stingy than ever with living expenses plus another big expense with repairs next year. I’m not super frugal all the time (hey I am a human) but I strive to be mindful with expenses! :’)

I feel much better deleting the bluesky app from my phone so I don't scroll my time away daily! :') Note I'll be more delayed with things & feeds as I now strive to only catch up/check around the time I post art/updates 🙏 More at discord/youtube/blog! #art #crossyroad #digitalart #burnout #blog

— Leonie Yue (@leonieyue.bsky.social) November 26, 2024 at 9:27 AM

Finally I feel much better not being able to see how many followers I have & others have. And I don’t have the Bluesky app in the past week anymore. Just not knowing eases my mind from envy, my insecurities and not feeling enough :’)

I’m behind and am checking my feeds less as I just don’t have the luxury to scroll and catch up properly now that I have to make the most of my limited off time :0 Apologies if I miss out on many things – now I just check around the time I post! I have other feeds/notifications/emails/messages outside of Bluesky I check already :0!

Still prefer Cara too.

It got too overwhelming and noisy over at Bluesky since the influx (yay more artists escaping twitter though) even with my efforts to manage my feeds. Now I don’t check unless I am posting something else I get addicted to scrolling my feeds.
Feeling better about these evolving boundaries!

I even block my follower metrics and try not to dwell on others’ reaching huge followers milestones as I don’t want to obsess over that anymore or feel inadequate/envious/depressed for my art and long form blog rambles I post.

With social media, I juggle my conflicted feelings and how interactive/engaged you have to be to be visible at certain times and it’s addictive and a huge time sink.

…I am tired.

Cara is more chill so I enjoy it lots!! Though I am mostly a passive lurker here…
It’s the only social public platform I still have the app on my phone for since I don’t feel addicted to it 😀

As with other places, I take care to just focus on sharing, check my feed briefly and then hide away :’)

I already have my blog, discord, YouTube and work/life things to keep tabs on haha.
I can’t juggle too many things :<
original cara post here

Reminder that currently I keep most active at my blog here, discord and youtube.

Anyhoo I’m tired and I need to finish up work – take care during these stressful, busy times!

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