8 minute Speedpaint process + text commentary! [short]

Yes I have stopped doing voiced commentary. I’ll talk about it in the next blog post ;P

I think this is too long…and took long to render too. I know Youtube’s ideal is 8 minutes but eh.

I’ll have to figure out a good length.

Squid kid Leonie enjoying hot chocolate! Team Milk Chocolate!

Well Team Milk Chocolate lost at the Splatfest but eh. White chocolate is too sweet for me ;P

Gosh it was viciously Team white chocolate winning everything too! There’s so many of them!

I guess American milk chocolate is that bad, huh.

Whelp so much for doing less posts this month – I’m doing more art because I wanted to and now I got more stuff I need to get back to doing eep :’) Internally stressing out!

I only just realised that there’s dailies (get a win for the day in 2 modes) to do in Splatoon 3 so I’m starting/attempting to do that regularly when able :0

Anyhoo! Please take care of your self and your loved ones!

Leonie reflects and rambles about romance and feelings. Happy Single time!!

Well as much as I’m a sappy, sad, lonely, longing, fantasising, silly romantic at heart I’m pretty much enjoying and feel complacent doing my own hermit thing. I’m not too gloomy about it ;P

It definitely depends on the situation but generally in terms of “love language” (which is not really true, just a rough, predictable, silly, simplistic guide, not to be taken seriously and as starting point to understanding yourself and everyone’s needs for expressing and receiving love, affection, care, communication) I value mutual acts of service, quality time, heart to heart talks, comforting physical touch/hugs and gaming times. I don’t fit into just a singular one of the official 5 categories. Then again that’s probably just my unrealistic hopes and standards because I have no experience in relationships. So how would I know what I miss and what’s realistic if I never had it? ;’D

I forget I am single until I meet affectionate/healthy couples, or when a relative asks about it (the pressure/expectation) or when facing some difficult life things and challenges. And it is harder to make friends who are also single as you get older.

As much as I had/have crushes (one sided romantic projections and feeling brokenhearted from that mostly), I’m more on the ace/asexual side of things plus I’m autistic so I think at best I’ll have friendships and avoid the dreaded/vague/infamous/toxic “situationships” for the sake of my mental health. I think I’m scared/uncomfortable/anxious/stressed/confused if it goes beyond that.

Dating itself doesn’t interest me – it seems so draining, stressful, a lot of work, a losing game and not fun to me. I don’t want to settle for just the bare minimum nor for anyone that makes me feel uncomfortable, pressured, anxious, insecure, doubtful, stressed out, unimportant and/or worthless either.

I probably need to always manage/adjust/balance/communicate my boundaries and expectations on a case by case basis with relationships, friendships and connections in general anyhow…which is a difficult learning process because humans are complex and change their minds! Communicating with boundaries and compromising well together are skills to be worked on. Well given that all involved are on the same, negotiable page.

And I’m not great at expressing/acting sappy or being romantic in real life – I’m more awkward, quiet, deadpan, anxious, overwhelmed, tensed up, anxious and confused during intimate/vulnerable/flirty moments since I’m not used to nor have much experience with that, I assume things at face value (so being subtle flies over my head most of the time) and I’m socially oblivious. And I could be zoning out haha

And if I do get emotional, angry and/or upset, I just want to deal with it right away or I can’t move on :’) Unfortunately it becomes impulsive, immature and at times not well thought out in my attempts to express myself, emotionally/physically distance myself or to work things out together. Yeah ongoing journey of managing my traumas.

How does one respond or say flowery, complimentary and/or flirty things? I don’t have the practice and experience that many people have – not that I’m seeking it anyway. With responding…I just freeze up quietly like a deer in the headlights and/or look away, awkwardly blurting out something haha

How does one determine compatibility with people? And how does one best deal with rejection (or in the face of casual, polite indifference, ghosting, silence, avoidance, lack of substantial communication)? Is there even a “best/healthy” way to do and respond to things when humans are much more complicated, mixed, conflicted, emotional and fickle?

Digressing! It’s meaningful to find fulfillment and validation in yourself, not depending wholly on/through other people! One does not need someone else to be happy and complete at all!

Do they actually add to your life – better and happier (and vice versa)? Are they worth spending/sharing time with and to grow together through the tough times? Do they support, encourage and share the same values? They can’t solve all your personal problems/issues either – but it’s great to have someone who will have your back even if they can’t solve it entirely.

You don’t need to value yourself according to sexual appeal, physical attractiveness/desirability and whether you get any attention/interest (this is so hard to manage, I don’t really look at myself properly in the mirror, feel invisible and I struggle with it). Beauty/attractiveness is subjective and a moving target as we grow older. I’m not interested in having kids either.

So what if I’m a “left over” spinster ;P I feel like I’m slowly caring about that less.

It’s okay to be single. There’s nothing wrong with it at all. And it’s okay to rely/depend on other people/friends for connection too.

Ah I’m just rambling again :0

Anyhoo as mentioned I’ve been stuck reading a range of bad/tropey and good/okay/meh romantic fiction/manhwa/manga/manhua/novels (not webtoon) to fill that void. My heart refuses to quit this timesink but I am slowly losing interest in some of the super tropey/predictable/boring ones. Other times I don’t care if it’s predictable. My mind says I need to read less of it but emotionally I want to keep up to date and for the romantic escapism…whelp :’)

Valentine’s Day doesn’t really mean much to me personally as you know but I do get reminded of chocolate and how it’s reminding you to express appreciation for those around you throughout the whole year in spite of this commercial day!

Plus I get to draw cute, warm, romantic, fuzzy things if I feel like it!

It’s a good excuse to treat yourself (whether you’re single or not)! Take care of yourself too!

Nintendo Direct thoughts and more from last week!

I’m less interested in Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom sadly. Probably because this trailer doesn’t really hook me in with the story so far. It felt like more of the same but developed further. It might be fun? I’m a bit tired of the blood moon thing. And how people debate and hope that Princess Zelda is playable (I hope so too). I’ll still play it but I’m not excited about it. At least not yet.

I will not burn myself out exploring every nook and cranny again (I hope :’) )

I am most excited for Pikmin 4 and I am hype for the return of Professor Layton!!

I’m keen to play Side Order DLC for Splatoon 3, Mario Kart 8 DX content eventually and play Kirby’s Return to Dreamland + bonus content!

Interested to watch the upcoming Yakuza Isshin Kiwami, Xenoblade Chronicles 3 DLC story (Alvis?! And how Rex makes me annoyed?), maybe Baten Kaitos, maybe play/watch Cereza and the Lost Demon and a lot more other games to watch that I’m not bothered listing ;P

Cool to see that these are/will be available: the Zelda Oracle series, Link’s Awakening , Mario and Luigi Super Star Saga, Zelda Minish cap, Kirby’s amazing mirror, Kirby’s tilt and tumble, Metroid Prime, Fashion Dreamer, We Love Katamari! I won’t be playing any of them since I’ve played most of these. I haven’t played the last four though. I have played a Metroid game ages ago but I don’t remember which one!

Finally Puss in Boots: The Last Wish was amazing! 😀

Anyhoo I was scrambling to get this video and this post done so I’m sleep deprived today! And I have so much to do!! But I shall take it slower today :’)

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