SuperListenMode 292: “I am enough”

SuperListenMode: “I am enough” post it

I met Luca [LucaMyriad], Alisha [alishast_], Emily [azhure_] & the MyriadGS team who were lovely company and to my surprise, appreciated this note I taped onto my phone cover ♥! Hello!

I have this at home, at work, on my phone cover and digital reminders too :’)

I think this is why a lot of us keep striving to do better, forever on a hamster wheel. Having something to prove. Sometimes forgetting to slow down to cherish the moment and reflect regularly what we really need.

I have reached the point where these reminders don’t strongly affect me since I usually push on with things in spite of my self doubt and fears. My mind already associates and understands its meaning? Maybe. It does give me an unconscious reminder for me to calm my fears and anxieties down a bit during the worst of times.

It doesn’t work every time.

I think slowing down to breathe in the present helps me better. Mindfulness. Or doing regular breaks and stretches.

I don’t feel enough as there’s always things I strive to do better in art and life [a lot of us have this feeling of lack]. I think that’s why I’m “quitting” social media since I don’t want to connect and unconsciously compare myself to others on a shallow, passive level anymore, always feeling several steps behind others.

For instance with friends,

I rarely do outwardly generous things since I don’t have many friends and I don’t do things if I feel obliged and pressured to [if I can help it]. I’m selfishly living in my own head. I’m not eloquent with words, reading others’ feelings nor great with gifts.

My way to appreciate friends is to spend quality time with them really! Because time and energy are most valuable to me.

And this creative rut is because I want to grow artistically but it’s been a huge struggle juggling everything else in my life, health and work. Something had to give so I stayed in my comfort zone and did mostly SLM comics in recent years to vent some of those feelings out.

It’s still very hard to believe in myself. And to stay kind to myself.

So easy to forget. :’)

This is why I appreciate having a few trusted friends I can occasionally ramble and vent with. We might not fully relate to each other but that’s okay. They’re the few people who have your best interests at heart, stick with you, remind you and support you through the bad, mundane and good times.

Most probably aren’t reading this but thank you so much. ♥

It’s tough when you need/want to ramble with somebody but no one you trust is readily available though. I really don’t have a reasonable sized support network.

So here we are ;P

Ultimately I need to believe in myself anyway.

Apparently I need to have more blind faith in myself and others…since I’m not great at it :’) But I don’t dive into things if I don’t feel that there’s a bigger purpose to it. Hmm. Existentialism again.

Stuff that, I need to move on and just try things when I can afford to haha.

[More info on where I got “I am enough” from: Marisa Peer: I am enough and her talk]

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