In this little blog post:

• LeonieArtRambles video outline [18.5 minutes]
• sketchbook arm muscle studies and gestures
• reflecting on art learning, metrics and posting art

LeonieArtRambles youtube video outline:

• for those new and old to the youtube channel: what I’ve been doing in the past 2 years since my last cat drawing video
• many thanks to patrons and where I’m more active on the internet
• why this video?
• plans for these sketchbook videos
• aside from attempting the beginning several times, I did the recording in one go! Goodness I feel and seem so awkward speaking as I listen back to it :’)
• mentioning patreon and special thanks to patrons again!!
  • not sure if I’ll do a special thanks section for patrons in these videos when I don’t even know if these videos will be an actual thing :’)
  • consequently I don’t know if I can promise patron callouts
• the rambly version of the reflection below

Woo sketchbook posts are back! Studying from book “Strength Training Anatomy” continues from February!

I’m just glad I’m slowly making progress, not procrastinating and doing studies as part of my regular posting schedule so that I keep doing these little study updates each week :0!

As with all my blog posts, I’ll switch between rambling/reflecting like I have here and posting art progress on its own. I’m rusty but I’ll keep working at learning and keep myself accountable.

I probably won’t do youtube LeonieArtRambles videos weekly like I will with these sketchbook study posts. Videos will be random, whenever I do a sketchbook post. So for more frequent art stuff, please do continue getting updates through this blog rather than youtube. Still the above youtube video is my attempt to try different things and reach out to more people due to its “search-ability”.

The reality is that I am a hermit freelance artist and I need to keep evolving through trial and error. I guess this means I’ll speak to a microphone again even though I feel rusty and awkward at it! :’)

Anyhoo! I have much to revise and learn in anatomy, figure drawing, character design, animal anatomy, composition, colour and light, storytelling and maybe environments if I get around to that one (as I don’t really enjoy it nor want to focus on that unless I have to do it for the visual storytelling). I’m not going to overwhelm myself with everything at once; probably do one or so at a time. It’s a lot and definitely a life long learning journey. I’ve been doing this blog for almost 9 years (gosh) so as much as I get frustrated and impatient sometimes, I have accepted that it’s going to be ongoing :’)

In regards to my posting schedule, I hope I can keep 1-3 times a week up! I don’t want things to get too unmanageable and I burn out (as someone who is on the autism spectrum) :<

Coming across advice (art/concept art youtubers) that one has to post something/anything everyday and on many platforms so that you work with the algorithm and exist on people’s feeds – feels discouraging. Maybe there’s “survivor/success” bias involved as they try to sell educational content while doing art and art videos – they’re telling people what works for them as independent freelance artists. That’s fair.

But posting daily is not sustainable for me (and for many others) as I hear plenty of stories about the resulting burnout and losing fulfillment in their lives from other artists and art youtubers :’) I don’t want to simply post anything just to keep chasing the algorithm and audience because I personally prefer curation over quantity when I consume and make content :’)

Gosh all of this “chasing things that don’t actually suit me” reminds me when I got advised to do 3D art, UI art and other multi skilled things I didn’t want to do – if I were to go into game art and get hired by game studios. Note that this was years ago before I was part of Mighty Games and nowadays I’m sure the advice still applies with even higher quality industry standards. At the time they told me figure drawing was a waste of time and pointless if I were to get a job in the games industry. I felt like I was being shamed for my occasional life drawing visits (that I used to do back then) but I ignored the advice anyway because I already quit teaching and was done trying to fit into a hole that wasn’t for me :’) Generally there’s been many experiences of “trying to fit into different holes and failing” because my heart was not really into it and/or I was unable to keep it sustainable :’)

Digressing! I don’t want the algorithm and what I think people or industry wants – dictate what I create and post (and how often). I don’t want patreon and posting art on social media become an endless, people pleasing cycle of burnout, desire for validation and to be valued (for my art and as a person). It’s a dangerous hole to fall into when I let metrics control my self worth and creativity. It tends to happen for me sometimes, especially as an isolated hermit with minimal social interactions.

That’s why I don’t really enjoy using social media too much as it becomes a drain on my mental health. It’s an ongoing process of emotionally distancing myself from the negatives of social media and using it sparingly for its positives and kind people :’) A balance act I suppose!

I do hope to keep making sketches and studies on a weekly basis though! This pace works for me better. Woo I’m getting a tiny bit more art confidence thanks to these little steps of progress!! Making studies is slowly becoming one of my regular habits 😀

At the moment I’m keeping the minimum to 30 minutes of rough figure drawing warm ups each day! I couldn’t do it previously because a combination of lack of motivation, hopelessness, laziness, negativity, depression and feeling stuck. Now my mindset is that I’m doing these studies for myself, to enjoy the learning process and make it a habit (progress!!) It’s not about trying to fit into what I think is expected of me. My mental and emotional thoughts towards learning has gotten a bit better (:

On a statistical side, I haven’t been looking at my overall blog stats summary (because normally I block it to protect my insecurities and anxiety haha) but I actually got over 300 views last month! I usually get somewhere in the 200’s :0!! A little milestone yay! Maybe not checking it at all helped me focus better! See – this is how insecure I was and probably still am ;P

Note that for a given blog post, maybe I’ll get 5 -10 views. So I’m randomly trying out youtube again to reach more people. If the video above doesn’t work out with no feedback, I’ll just stop doing it ;D

With social media, I’m far away from reaching my metric milestones but I do hope to reach them one day :0!! I haven’t been growing much in recent years but I’m not going to stress too much about it. Metrics are useful to get a loose idea of how you’re resonating with people but it’s not as important as the quality connections along the way (:

Anyhoo, this is very much thanks to the generous support of my patrons!! Thank you for reading and take care with your own little learning and life adventures!

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