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Friday, August 5, 2016

Hermit Bear Leonie Tackles Vector Art [JUL2016]

Leonie's small blog island says hullo! (:

This month shall be about learning and rambling about it. 


You know, the usual ;)
And I'm being terrible at vector art.
Out of my comfort zone!

Hooo here we go!

    Let's go crazy! Journal Time.

    My Neighbour Totoro fanart
    Had an awesome & understanding person at work in mind when I did this practice :0 Cute Totoro family!


    CONTENTS for your READING QUEST:


    Year 3, Month 7 (July)

      Leonie Yue's Sketchbook 

      Why are you looking at me like that?
      Making faces when zoning out, thinking about sad or funny things
      It scares my bro :0

      SuperListenMode Awkward about Compliments

      I learned to say "thank you" in response years ago but inside, I still feel weird when kind people compliment me and/or my work. It really makes me happy though in spite of my inner harsh & perfectionist self. :0

      Thank youuu It helps kick my nitpicking to the kerb for a bit and appreciate the progress so far ^_^
      SuperListenMode: Different Social Environments
      Ah introverting and feeling alone among people
      I rather enjoy familar & small group fun exploratory times (:
      Aside from dancing situations, I prefer someplace where you don't have to shout to be heard. 
      I'm quiet spoken as it is already :0
       SuperListenMode Artist Competitiveness & Envy
      Embracing the cycle of learning all the same 
      Hey it happens when you feel you need to get better at your own work! :0
      So you acknowledge this, let it pass, appreciate how awesome they are, get pumped & focus on your own progress. (: I could say jealousy too when it comes with creatives who are incredibly charismatic with people :0
       SuperListenMode: Workaholic
      Too much tunnel vision & forgetting all about social things; Whoops :'(
      Yes I actually have that little sign on my desk haha
      So I have listen mode, work mode and zone out/rest mode...all of which are quiet activities so I guess if I actually made conversation and noise - it's a rare thing! Gosh my infamous quietness! :0 
      Anyhoo, Just wanted to say I deeply appreciate it & feel special all the same when peeps invite & include me to things whether I could go or not! Plus even I feel like a background NPC support character at social things ^.^
       I'm always going to feel like I'm missing out something...as a kind someone reassured me though!
      SuperListenMode: Breast Cancer Awareness
      As someone who lost her mother as a result of breast cancer, figured I should do a random PSA for anyone that needs this for the sake of early detection. 
      Save this image to your desktop, 
      make a calendar reminder each month to do a boob check (I do that!)
      or even share this to people you care about that should do the same.
      Hey donations to cancer research is a wonderful plus!
      Lastly, do take care of yourselves!!

      SuperListenMode: No hugs :(

      I may internally say that sometimes but it's getting better as I keep dismissing that silly negative self talk! It's unhelpful!! :0 I was so warmed by the supportive kind people who relate to this though (:
       SuperListenMode: "Retail" Therapy
      So much art things I would want!! And things to fill the void...
      Too expensive so I don't actually buy it D:

       Sometimes it's not what you need (due to your sense of lack) or it's too pricey so you just look at it online D:

      SuperListenMode: 1-dimensional

      Wha? I'm supposed to socialise now? Whoops
      On one hand, I stay focused and manage to keep distractions to a minimum while on the outside, I'm probably rude, boring, unapproachable and unwelcoming .___.

      Gosh since I don't make social time, I don't really have the conversational practice (out of my comfort zone too)! I think it comes down to how I feel at the time, how genuinely interested I am in talking to someone over a period of time and more importantly if it's mutual (especially if we can learn things from one another). 

      Then again, I'm usually the ignorant one so I'm sure I have loads to learn from people in general! Just not sure what I can offer back though since listening is my default :0 

      But hey, when able I'll wave & smile at cool people at least! haha
      Thankfully Lauren is a terribly supportive buddy and assured me that I'm not rude or dismissive so I'm going to take her word for it ^.^;
      Mason from the interesting Dating Sim, Hustle Cat
      She's a quiet, reserved but strong, outwardly-confident character who respects her personal space outside of work and takes a long while to warm up to people - which I relate. Was watching her route (and the other female option previous to that s few months ago) and she's really buff too unlike me! :0 

      She becomes fiercely loyal to you once you understand, help her in the right direction (so she gets over her stubborn pride) and gain her trust; ultimately she will protect the ones she cares about.

      Anyhoo, I've only seen two routes so far and the main story arc is somewhat different in each! All the alternate realities!
      Looking forward to watching the rest :D
      Kirby: Planet Robobot - Mastermind Susie
      I love this game; it's so fun, cuteness & loads of homage to the whole franchise :D All the cool abilities and Mech abilities; it's incredible to play!! Apparently there's a huge 
      Gurren Lagann influence in this too! 
      A Shooty Skies Poster
      for the Destination Mars Update :0
      SuperListenMode: Pokemon Go Edition
      Okay when I found that my device truly was incompatible with the game I deleted the intended temporary apk (executable?) file I had since it's not officially from Google Play and it's not going to be updated anyway :'(

      Given that I barely use my phone at all with a 500MB a month, it's probably not worth it for me to upgrade from my Samsung Galaxy SII for this :S I only use my phone for logistical/emergency purposes. This game incurred an additional data fee, whoops >.>

      That said, this game made me actually use GPS, used up most of my data within less than a week and made my phone crash/power off several times. Zubats, Doduos, Rattatas, Weedles and all that are so common in my area when I could barely go to Level 5. Still I admired what other people have gotten :0

      At least I got a taste of the experience! I'm putting all my Pokemon childhood hopes & dreams into other people playing the game now :< At least I got shown a Charizard at the least by a friend!! :0
      Shooy Skies: Cute Cuddle Chaos Comic Update :0
      All the cute characters from the latest update :D
      Hoy it’s a ShootySkies “I’m fabulous” Shirt! :0
      Time to fly the skies and sprinkle the world with rainbows and sparkles!!
      Keep on believing in yourself! >:D

      Oh if you’re a merchandise kind of person and you’d like this on a shirt or on a sticker head over to: http://www.redbubble.com/people/mightygames/shop/ 
      There’s other cool things there too! It’s been out since March so this is belated…um whoops D:
      Colour options!
      this is if you'd like different colour comparisons because there's choice in Red Bubble :0



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      Leonie Learns: Horrible Adobe Illustrator Shenanigans!

      I'm learning bits of Unity and Illustrator slowly. At least what I can in due time...so many things to learn so I'll take my time and not actually try to be a master at everything. :S Let's just say I do not expect to catch up to amazing professional graphic designers and game developers with decades of experience haha. But I'll do my best at seeing what I can do with this program!

      Vector art is not a workflow I'm used to and I don't enjoy it because so much nitpicking is involved to get it perfect and efficient. Personally I tend to lean more towards spontaneous drawing and "let the art flow" approach. But I pushed through anyway to get the result I want. I've been trying different things to see what works for me so here comes some of the terrible stuff I'm willing to show! Slowly Illustrator is becoming tolerable and okay for me.

      The last time I used illustrator was for the font and text of Position:Vacant's poster (my team's graduate film) and the last time I learned about the pen tool was in 2012 so...I'm starting somewhere close to Newbie/beginner levels. The pen tool and strokes and things...! :0

      Kirby Fanart!
      Trying to get used to shapes and strokes :S Practicing...
      And people seemed to like this one :0

      BurpDoodle A real Kirby Cafe

      Will happen in August in Japan! :0 

      I'm not even an intense Kirby fan but *grabby hands* I want it!

      One day I’ll go with my bro with this place in mind :’)

      It's got cute looking food and stationery goods! :0!! 
      I'm such a hermit in Melbourne but even I want to go there .__.
      BurpDoodle: Yeti Support Turbo Boost!
      So I was trying to doodle a Yeti in Illustrator :0 This is horrible haha
      Anyhoo stay warm! Hang in there and take care of yourself if you're overwhelmed; you got this!

      Overall, there isn't much to show so far because a lot of this was done during my spare time when I wasn't heavily sick :'( 

      I'm getting the impression that the pen tool is the king here. Then the pathfinder tools. And maybe the brush/blob thingie tools. Perhaps other tools too; I got my mind expanded when I realised how there are more easier ways to do things than depend wholly on the Pen tool. Other times I felt that maybe the Pen Tool is the way to go. So much choice and ways to do things!! Gradients tend to get fiddly though. All the things. Paralyzed. :0

      Initially I wanted to just spend June on this but I got sick twice...so getting my head around Illustrator expanded into July and a bit :0 Obviously I'm not striving to master it all and even if I am, I can't do it within less than two months haha

      But what do I want to do with Illustrator anyway? Well I wanted to see what kinds of art I can make with it and experiment really. What tools and workflows I can try so I might actually give Illustrator a chance for some things that call for it. It's best for scalable UI art, graphic things, layouts, stylised illustrations, typography and logo design. 

      Come to think of it and if anyone remembered, I made my logo/signature in Illustrator too way back when! :0
          



      Leonie Learns: embracing the hunger!

      Akin to my post about ambition, I am always and still hungry to learn more, get better, blog about it, collaborate with cool people and slowly grow my social circles organically. Yes I mean this even if I am infamously quiet.

      I just need to stop squirming away from things I want and things that pushes me to grow further, just because I didn't think I should ask/accept/try/do it :0 Ooh scary risk taking!

      Sure I definitely want to reach and connect with more people. Who doesn't, as a working artist/creative who desires genuine people and peers looking and appreciating their progress and work? The connection/communication between the viewer & creator is a special feeling. 

      Broken record: I deeply appreciate all the kind people encouraging me to keep going! 
      You keep going too, you awesome hoomin! (: 



      Hello fears, the repetitive usual ramble
      I have to manage the "fear of growing distant from existing friendships", "internet popularity curiosity", "constant fear/sense of lacking things in my life" and "eternal peer recognition & friendship hunger" (more meaningful when it comes from people you truly respect and admire). 

      Though when something or someone goes popular, I don't jump in unless I feel genuinely connected with it/them :0 Otherwise I just keep moving along haha

      I digress. Hey I do have these fears and that's okay - ignoring/hiding them makes it stronger. Each time I talk about it makes sure I manage it and stay genuine with what I say or do. I'm not going to pretend I don't have any fears! :0 Plus it's great when people around me have better social reach or "popularity" than I do; it's awesome, I'm happy for them and it reminds me to stay humble. And focus on my own progress again. (:

      I digress! All this is a matter of me needing to take action on my feelings of isolation and making/keeping friendships. A mix of investing/committing time into other people whom I may or may not have warmed up yet. How much I trust, respect, connect with and have warmed up to a given person over a long period of time. :0

      And competitively judging/comparing people by their social currency, journey and career accomplishments is part of the professional creative/entertainment industry - friendly competition and ideally a community that supports each other. Seeing what others are doing and understanding why they are doing it their way is important so to not let yourself get "left behind" or "blindly copying others" when applying them to your own projects! 

      Comparing without being self depreciating is terribly difficult though! Don't let the numbers determine others' or your self worth either! (I'm saying this to myself too hehe)

      But! All you *can* really do and control is focus on doing your best at what you do, in any case. Get inspired by other people, sure! But frequently I strive to refocus on doing things through self progress rather than stressful and tiring competition against amazing people. They're an evolving person just like you!

      Hey, let's do better next time (:

      Currently I'm warming up to people as humans and friends more. Well, that's from my end at least. Defining people by their projects/clients or their social reach alone sometimes tends to be shallow, as admirable and inspiring awesome people seem to be. 

      In general, I'm not a fan of putting people on towering pedestals and yet I do it when it comes to conversation skills (my weakness!!) :0 

      Anyhoo, I want to bond with people in person to complement the online interactions! I act different in person in that I'm quiet, introverted and reserved whereas I type long personal posts like this online - so I make that clear in my comics (I hope!) This is probably my fear of lacking social skills speaking.

      I know I need to speak up and learn how to not care what people think in person - as mentioned last month :S If people aren't interested, too preoccupied or not ready to interact (goes for me many times) then it's okay! Time is too valuable so I appreciate and respect my and everyone else's time (: 

      I'm usually too tired to do anything after a full day of work though .__.

      My self confidence always needs the social practice which I've been neglecting;  enjoy working and learning too much like a hermit :0 And I probably need to build upon my social energy tank. Eventually I shall!! >:0

      Ah silly insecurities. Acknowledging it and working with it (: 
      Bap them away and self care!

      Terribly grateful for Lauren's suggestion to eventually do one social thing a week as a goal. As much as I enjoy and focus on working, arting and learning (clearly my priorities lie here), finding my own way to bond with others is something I've always need practice with. It's something I'm planning to read about, investigating my own reasons, gaining more self awareness and taking small steps towards personal development. Or not. Perhaps once a month to start with? Hm! :S

      All the same at my turtle pace, I hope to improve and you'd see it through my little comic moments (and in depth here in this blog of course)! (:

      I don't want to say specifically what my goals are because I'm sure it'll be changing due to lots of trial and error or when things get terribly busy for me D: At the time of this post, it's been busy!! 

      And what if it turns out that I just want to stick to working, arting, learning, resting and listening? It's what I've always been doing. I guess nothing terrible will happen - I'll just learn at a turtle pace as I have been thus far. I will have to keep embracing the solitude but I shall keep learning and stay self aware for opportunities to bond with others! :0

      That's ultimately why I ramble about this so much - I'm figuring things out!
      This social/friendship thing as usual.

      Well you're here at least! Thank you for listening to me as I work out my comfort zone! *hugs!!* Apologies for being repetitive about what might be considered common sense to most people haha

      Thanks for indulging me if you haven't skipped this already ;)





      Hungrier and hungrier for learning
      Meanwhile, I have the stronger hunger of learning all the art and skills to do all the cool things!! As always, I am keen to be part of something awesome! And then be proud of my progress so far! Then it starts all over again :')

      I daresay: let's focus and just go with the ride called life, shall we? ;)  

      My tiny belated birthday present to myself finally arrived :0 
      Take matters into my own hands if I want something >;)
      It was pricey but I've wanted a skull to study for so long ^_^







      The past month: oh wow! I'm in a game!

      Somehow sneaked into the DisneyCrossyRoad cool peeps credits as a playable tiny character shhh! :0 
      And I learned to screenshot on my tablet hehe

      Note I just help out a bit with the art as I learn! This is really for those who are confused with one of the things I do and haven't heard of this game. In short, I make pixel art but in 3D. I hope this helps more? (:

      At least I did make myself here so I'm pudgy hehe

      And gosh I didn't expect people to react so heartwarmingly sweet ^.^; <3


      SuperListenMode Noooo

      Originally, I was slowly getting better from the cold and...getting back to work & exercising...

      And then I got sick again. I was just on the tail end of last month’s birthday cold too... :( 
      Sometimes you can’t avoid people who are sick -__-

      Ah Winter. I'm starting to see why people hate it, now that I'm not a Hermit anymore :0 The people who cough and sneeze on other people are scary; I wear a medical mask on public transport now! D:

      At the time, I did feel a bit better doodling this “keep away” warning, hoping I didn't get colleagues sick and I saw a doctor. Strove to rest up like a hermit bear otherwise and currently I'm better...again haha Back to exercising! Yeah!

      There's been a pattern of crazy busyness and people getting overwhelmed around this time! I'm currently working through a busy period too...though I'm always busy with something but I strive not to burn out as much as I can.

      Anyhoo take care of yourselves with your health! Protect your sleep time! :0



      Thanks for your company! ❤ Keep adventuuuring you!

      As always, thank you so much for reading. If you're still out there! :0
      I appreciate you, as much as I type and reflect to myself.

      You keep at it too; it's a crazy time of the year! You got this!!
      Do the best you can and be your own best friend - so take care of yourself! Especially when you're feeling burnt out and overwhelmed. :(

      See you next month!! :D



      Leonie